A few years later, tragedy strikes when Luke is run over and killed during an argument with Luci. She sinks into a deep depression and for months does not leave her room. She even sleeps in Luke’s bed in an attempt to feel closer to him. Slowly she emerges from her depression, but the family are concerned when she starts behaving erratically; not sleeping for days, won’t eat and embarks on a stream of ambitious projects. All the family doctor can do is give her sedatives to help Luci sleep and the family grow increasingly frustrated with her unpredictable behaviour and moods.

At University, Luci finds love with Ben. When tragedy strikes again only weeks from their wedding day, Luci begins to feel she has been cursed. By now she is sharing a flat with Alex, and they grow increasingly closer until they realise they are in love. What should be a happy period for Luci is once again thrown into turmoil when her alternating depressive and manic episodes return. After one particularly bad episode, Alex convinces Luci to see a Doctor who recommends a period of inpatient care in a Psychiatric unit.

Ever since her mother uttered those shocking words to her, Luci has been striving to discover the secrets her mother took to her grave. A chance finding of a box of sentimental items leads her to a long lost cousin of her mother. What is the truth that she discovers? What does “fire in your eyes” mean? How will Luci’s future be affected by the revelations?

This is the emotionally charged story of living with Bipolar Syndrome. Through reading this book you will understand how Bipolar (also known as Manic Depression) can affect, not only the sufferer, but everyone around them. Martine (herself with a mental health diagnosis) has done a fantastic job of relating Luci’s journey towards a diagnosis. The highs and the lows are charted for the reader to follow. You won’t feel sympathy for Luci, but you will feel empathy, and probably admiration for what she has to endure. I found myself feeling anger towards the family GP for failing to act earlier. However it is important to remember that mental health education has come a long way since the period in which the book was set. It hasn’t come far enough yet though. There remains a lot of ignorance and discrimination towards the mentally ill, but Martine writes an enjoyable, captivating story. I couldn’t put this book down and my education of the subject matter was a very a pleasant experience indeed.

~ Review by Veronica Pullen

This novel is a compulsive read. It charts the tortuous road that the main character Luci travels towards maturity. As the intense narrative unfolds, we, the readers, suffer with her as her developing mental disorder goes undiagnosed until it is almost too late.

The novel explores notions of identity and the problems of truly knowing, and being able to trust, another person. It is gripping, with many twists and turns, some very shocking, and it finally comes to a hair-raising climax. What better recommendation can be offered than to say there should be a sequel?

~ Review by Janet Glazier for Rethink’s Your Voice magazine.

Remember that Signed copies of The Fire in Your Eyes are available from Rethink’s Mental Health Shop.

Fifteen years ago, Luci’s mother committed suicide, leaving behind a legacy of lies that Luci is still struggling to uncover…

Now, a year after Luci was left reeling by the twin revelations that she had bipolar affective disorder, and that the grandfather she had thought was dead was still alive, she finally feels ready to meet her grandfather for the first time – hoping that he will be able to shed light on the secrets of the past.

But Walter’s reaction to Luci’s visit raises more questions than it answers – and it is only after his death that Luci is able to discover the tragic truth, which shocks her to the very core of her being.

Legacy of Lies is a heart-rending story that stretches back over several generations, unveiling the deplorable state of psychiatric care in the early twentieth century, but which ultimately offers a message of hope for those suffering mental illness today.

Buy Now from Chipmunka Publishing, priced at £14.99 including UK postage, or email me to order a signed copy!

My three novels are also available as Kindle Editions, with Schizoaffective Disorder Simplified coming soon to Kindle!

See the Where to Buy page for more details.

Schizoaffective disorder is a condition which shares symptoms with both bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, and which affects as many as 1 in 200 people – 0.5% of the population. Surprisingly, there have been few books written about schizoaffective disorder, and even fewer aimed at the general reader. Until now.

Schizoaffective Disorder Simplified is your comprehensive and up-to-date guide to schizoaffective disorder, featuring an introduction to the condition, its symptoms, its treatment and various ways that people can learn to manage their illness, as well as a series of helpful worksheets for people with schizoaffective disorder. Aimed at the general reader, whether you have schizoaffective disorder, care for someone with the illness or just have a curious interest in the subject, this book will answer all your questions about schizoaffective disorder, and give you an insight into what it is like to live with mania, depression and psychosis.

‘Promise me you’ll never tell anyone. This can just be our little secret.’

Fourteen years ago, Adam Waddoups made his father a promise – and for fourteen years, he’s kept that promise, keeping to himself the secret that could so easily rip the fabric of his family apart.

But keeping secrets comes at a cost for Adam, and he is tortured by the memories of the past, trapped in a cycle of guilt that regularly plunges him into episodes of depression and mania, which push him dangerously close to the edge.

When Adam is diagnosed with bipolar disorder – a diagnosis which is later adjusted to the lesser known schizoaffective disorder – and referred to a psychotherapist, he is forced to confront the demons of his past – and to finally admit the truth, allowing him, at last, to shape a more positive future for himself.

“There is fire in your eyes and it frightens me…”

At the age of twelve, Luci cannot possibly comprehend what her mother means by those words – and her mother’s suicide just hours later means she cannot ask. But the words will come to haunt Luci in the years to come as she battles with the highs and lows of undiagnosed manic-depression.

The tragic death of her twin brother at the age of seventeen marks the beginning of a rollercoaster ride of intense emotion that pushes Luci to the very limits of her endurance. Her manic recklessness has far-reaching consequences, for both Luci and her extended family, and the accompanying episodes of depression leave Luci teetering on the thin line between life and death.

When Luci meets Ben, she actually dares to hope that he might be the one person who can keep her on an almost even keel. But when tragedy steals Ben from her just weeks before their wedding day, Luci is left despairing of ever being happy as her tempestuous moods spiral once again out of control.

Luci’s hopes of happiness are rekindled when she finds love in an unexpected quarter, but as the rollercoaster ride becomes ever more extreme, an episode of psychotic mania threatens everything Luci holds dear, culminating in her hospitalisation and diagnosis with bipolar affective disorder (manic depression).

By turns funny and tragic, The Fire in Your Eyes thrusts the reader deep into the tumult that is untreated manic-depression, a real rollercoaster of a ride.